Following Jesus

Remember

shelliwilliams Breathing Out Series , ,

(part of the “Breathing Out” Lenten Series)

Scripture Text:  Mark 1: 4-11

4John the baptizer appeared in the wilderness, proclaiming a baptism of repentance for the forgiveness of sins. 5And people from the whole Judean countryside and all the people of Jerusalem were going out to him, and were baptized by him in the river Jordan, confessing their sins. 6Now John was clothed with camel’s hair, with a leather belt around his waist, and he ate locusts and wild honey. 7He proclaimed, “The one who is more powerful than I is coming after me; I am not worthy to stoop down and untie the thong of his sandals. 8I have baptized you with water; but he will baptize you with the Holy Spirit.”

9In those days Jesus came from Nazareth of Galilee and was baptized by John in the Jordan. 10And just as he was coming up out of the water, he saw the heavens torn apart and the Spirit descending like a dove on him. 11And a voice came from heaven, “You are my Son, the Beloved; with you I am well pleased.”

Whenever I write daily during Lent, I am always wondering what to do with this week before Palm Sunday.  After all, the Lectionary passages for this coming Sunday ARE Palm Sunday.  So, maybe it’s a good time to sort of “take stock” as we come closer and closer to the Cross, as we walk with Jesus through those last days.

My grandmother lived to be over 100.  She developed a plethora of physical ailments but she never lost her sharp mind and her memory.  In those last few years before her death, I had wonderful times of just driving around our hometown with her (the one we had BOTH grown up in) and sharing her memories.  I knew what she was doing.  She was “taking stock”.  She knew that the end of her earthly life was imminent and this was her way of making sure she left what she needed for us, that we knew from where we’d come.  So, together, we sat on a road that used to be “out in the country” as she recounted where the family farmhouse had been and down the road from there where the Stockdick School was that my great grandfather had built.  (Those are now covered with suburban homes, grocery stores, and a really cute wine bar.) 

On one of the trips, we went to the old cemetery where there are relatives back to my great-great grandparents (on two sides of the family…yeah, we don’t get out much).  My grandmother wanted to find the gravestone of her dad’s younger brother who had died as a child to get the year he died.  She called him Little Roy.  So, I remember kneeling down in the mud scraping on a more than hundred-year-old tombstone (he died in 1899) to get the death date while my grandmother stood there on her walker watching me.  I ended up going back to the car and digging in my purse for a pencil and a piece of paper and I did a rubbing of it. We were “taking stock” of those important moments–together.

After my grandmother died, we found all these notes where she had tried to recount all the family stories.  I also found the pencil rubbing of Little Roy’s tombstone.  I took all those and put together a book of sorts.  They were the important things that my grandmother “took stock of” before she died.  They needed to be remembered. 

Don’t you imagine that Jesus was doing some of that?  I mean, he knew things did not look good.  He knew where things were going.  So, he began to take stock of his life. Had he served God in the way he was called to?  Had he shown his followers what they needed to see?  Had he left something that would take hold?  Jesus was human.  Of course he was asking himself those questions.  (That’s why it’s OK for US to ask those questions!)

And so, he remembered his baptism.  He remembered with love his cousin John, who had baptized him in that cold murky water of the Jordan.  John was gone now.  Only beautiful memories remain.  He remembers that point where he knew it was time to begin his ministry, to walk the walk that God had called him to.  He had gone to John to be baptized.  Even Jesus couldn’t baptize himself!  It was what he would call his followers to do so it was his to do also.  He knelt down and John had bent over him.  And it was then the heavens opened up and the Spirit emerged in the form of a dove.  We read of the heavens being “torn”, violently ripped apart so that they could not go back together in the same way.  The Greek word there is a form of the verb schitzo as in schism or schizophrenia. It is not the same word as open. I open the door. I close the door. The door looks the same, but something torn apart is not easily closed again. The ragged edges never go back together as they were. The Gospel writer known as Mark wasn’t careless in using that word: schitzo. He remembered Isaiah’s plea centuries before when the prophet cried out to God, “Oh, that you would tear the heavens open and come down to make your name known to your enemies and make the nations tremble at your presence.” In other words, at this moment, God’s Spirit on earth became present in a brand new way.  A new ordering of Creation had begun. 

It was at that moment that the heavens opened and spilled onto the earth.  The Holy Spirit descended upon Jesus like a dove.  And we heard what the world has always been straining to hear: “You are my Son, the Beloved, with you I am well pleased.”  In this moment, Jesus knew his ministry had begun.  This is the moment toward which all of Creation has been moving.  This the moment for which we’ve been waiting.

And we remember in this moment that it had begun.  And at the same time we remember our own baptism, that moment when the heavens are torn apart and spill out into the earth.  Breathe…breathe out wanting to hold back.  Breathe out wanting to keep things the way they were.  Breathe out the reticence you may have.  And breathe in…breathe in your baptism, breathe in what God is calling you to do, breathe in the Spirit that spilled out of the heavens.  It is yours, meant for you.  The heavens will tear again soon.  The temple curtain will rip in two.  Perhaps this tearing was a foretelling of what was to come.  For now, we take stock.  And we remember.  And we follow Jesus on this journey.

Jesus was still wet with water after John had baptized him when he stood to enter his ministry in full submission to God.  As he stood in the Jordan and the heavens tore apart and spilled into the earth, all of humanity stood with him.  We now stand, wet with those same waters, as we, too, are called into ministry in the name of Christ.  As we emerge, we feel a cool refreshing breeze of new life.  Breathe in.  It will be with you always. Submit your life, empty yourself, so that there will finally be room for Christ in this world.  Then…it is up to you to finish the story.  This day and every day, remember your baptism, remember that you are a daughter or son of God with whom God is well pleased and be thankful. You are now part of the story.  Take stock of it all. 

The future enters into us, in order to transform itself in us, long before it happens. (Rainer Maria Rilke)

Grace and Peace,

Shelli

Just Go

shelliwilliams EPIPHANY , ,

Matthew 4: 12-23 (Epiphany 3A)

12Now when Jesus heard that John had been arrested, he withdrew to Galilee. 13He left Nazareth and made his home in Capernaum by the sea, in the territory of Zebulun and Naphtali, 14so that what had been spoken through the prophet Isaiah might be fulfilled: 15“Land of Zebulun, land of Naphtali, on the road by the sea, across the Jordan, Galilee of the Gentiles— 16the people who sat in darkness have seen a great light, and for those who sat in the region and shadow of death light has dawned.” 17From that time Jesus began to proclaim, “Repent, for the kingdom of heaven has come near.”

18As he walked by the Sea of Galilee, he saw two brothers, Simon, who is called Peter, and Andrew his brother, casting a net into the sea—for they were fishermen. 19And he said to them, “Follow me, and I will make you fish for people.” 20Immediately they left their nets and followed him. 21As he went from there, he saw two other brothers, James son of Zebedee and his brother John, in the boat with their father Zebedee, mending their nets, and he called them. 22Immediately they left the boat and their father, and followed him.

23Jesus went throughout Galilee, teaching in their synagogues and proclaiming the good news of the kingdom and curing every disease and every sickness among the people.

Simon got up early that morning.  No big surprise there…he ALWAYS got up early.  He was always the first one up in the morning, hurriedly dressing and then going behind the house to untangle the still-damp nets from the day before.  As he got them ready for yet another day of fishing, he smelled the fish cooking in olive oil and the fresh bread baking in the oven.  It smelled good just like it does every morning.   He began to hear stirring in the house as the children got up and began to help their mother. It was just an ordinary day.

After breakfast he made his way the mile or so down to the shore where he and his brother had left the boat.  It was a good, sturdy boat and they felt so fortunate that they were finally doing well enough to buy it.  He carried the heavy nets that still smelled of yesterday’s catch.  As he approached the boat, he saw that Andrew was waiting for him and had already begun to untie the boat and ready it for the day.  So without even saying good morning to each other, they together hoisted the heavy nets up to the boat, Andrew got on, and Simon pushed the boat into the water, walking into the lake until it was about waste deep.  He then pulled himself up into the boat as it moved toward the middle of the lake.

This was his favorite part of the morning—that quiet trip from Bethsaida down the shores of the lake.  They were headed toward Tabgha this morning, near the Capernaum side of the lake but it was usually not near as busy.  The fog was lifting and you could see all around the lake itself.  Then they slowed and, without speaking, Simon and Andrew put their nets down into the lake to see what they could catch.  Yes, it was just another ordinary day.  

After about two hours of a really unbelievable catch, Simon steered the boat back toward the shores below Capernaum.   He looked up on the hill and saw the synagogue at the top of the hill.  It made him feel good just to look at it.  He hoped that someday he would be able to make the trip to Jerusalem and see the temple that it faced.  As they neared the shore, they began to drop their net again hoping to snare some of the common musht fish that tended to congregate there at the shore.  As the net went down, he looked up.  There on the shore was a man, a man he had seen before around the lake, a man that he thought they called Jesus. He had heard about this man, a rabbi, he thought.  Just then the man spoke:  “Follow me.”  Simon turned around expecting to see the one whom Jesus was calling standing behind him.   But there was only lake.  He touched Andrew’s arm and they both looked up.  “Follow me,” Jesus said again, “and I will make you fishers of people.”

But something happened.  Simon and Andrew looked at each other in disbelief.  You want me to do WHAT? After all, they were fishermen.  They had nothing to offer and no real gifts.  But Jesus repeated his call.  They knew that he was asking them to join him, to join him in ministry.  And they both knew that they would go.  They lifted up the nets, now filled with fish—more fish than they had seen in the last two weeks combined.  They pulled the nets up out of the water and then tied the boat to the shore.  As they stepped into the water, the sun seemed to shine brighter than ever.  The synagogue on the hill was radiant in light.  It was just an ordinary day.  But life would never be the same again.  And they couldn’t do anything else.

OK, I took a little poetic license with the story.  But the point is that Simon and Andrew were not especially gifted people.  In the first century around this lake called Galilee, Simon and Andrew were pretty ordinary.  But Jesus asked them to follow anyway.  And they went.  In fact, the text says they went immediately.  They didn’t wait until they had enough money or enough time or enough talent.  They didn’t hold back because they thought they were too old or too settled.  They just went.

Simon would become Peter, the “rock”, one of Jesus’ apostles and ultimately would be made a saint in the tradition of the church.  Frederick Buechner says, “Our calling is where our deepest gladness and the world’s deepest hunger meet.”  Think about what that means.  God calls us.  Sometimes it’s pretty scary.  Sometimes we want to run away.  Sometimes we try to hide on the back pew hoping no one will notice that we’re there.  Sometimes it means that we have to leave the life we’ve built behind.  And sometimes it just means that we need to do something different.  But following wherever God leads means that we will truly find joy.  We will finally know what it’s all about.  So, what about you?  Where is God calling you?  We are all called but it usually means that we have to fish in different waters and look at things in different ways.  And, if we’re honest with ourselves, we will find that we can’t do anything else.  God is calling you.  So, what now?  Just go…

God…leads us step by step, from event to event.  Only afterwards, as we look back over the way we have come and reconsider certain important moments in our lives in the light of all that has followed them, or when we survey the whole progress of our lives, do we experience the feeling of having been led without knowing it, the feeling that God has mysteriously guided us. (Paul Tournier)

Grace and Peace,

Shelli

The Wilderness is Where We Knew Where We Must Go

shelliwilliams Holy Week, LENT, Wilderness , , , , , , , ,

Transfiguration

Scripture Text:  Mark 9: 2-10

2Six days later, Jesus took with him Peter and James and John, and led them up a high mountain apart, by themselves. And he was transfigured before them, 3and his clothes became dazzling white, such as no one on earth could bleach them. 4And there appeared to them Elijah with Moses, who were talking with Jesus. 5Then Peter said to Jesus, “Rabbi, it is good for us to be here; let us make three dwellings, one for you, one for Moses, and one for Elijah.” 6He did not know what to say, for they were terrified. 7Then a cloud overshadowed them, and from the cloud there came a voice, “This is my Son, the Beloved; listen to him!” 8Suddenly when they looked around, they saw no one with them any more, but only Jesus. 9As they were coming down the mountain, he ordered them to tell no one about what they had seen, until after the Son of Man had risen from the dead. 10So they kept the matter to themselves, questioning what this rising from the dead could mean.

 

The wilderness has taught us to see things differently, to open our minds and widen our souls.  It has called us to remove the veil that we have created in our lives to shield us from the things that do not make sense in our world.  The journey through the wilderness has brought us to this place, brought us to this mountain.  Don’t you think the disciples were sort of wondering where they were going?  After all, they had left everything they had, had given up everything and sacrificed all of those things that made life secure and safe.  They did it all to follow Jesus and now they are climbing up this mountain to a place that they did not know.

The mountain that Jesus and the disciples climb sounds a lot like Mount Sinai rising out of the wilderness that Moses had ascended centuries before.  And there on the mountain, they see Jesus change, his clothes taking on a hue of dazzling, blinding white, whiter than anything they had ever seen before.  And on the mountain appear Moses and Elijah, standing there with Jesus—the law, the prophets, all of those things that came before, no longer separate, but suddenly swept into everything that Christ is, swept into the whole presence of God right there on that mountain.  And then the voice…”This is my Son, my Chosen:  listen to him!” OK…what would you have done?  First the mountain, then the cloud, then these spirits from the past, and now this voice…”We are going to die.  We are surely going to die,” they must have thought.   And then, just as suddenly as they appeared, Moses and Elijah drop out of sight and Jesus was standing there alone, completely unveiled.  And all that was and all that is has become part of that, swept into this Holy Presence of God.  And, more importantly, we are invited into it.  No longer are we shielded from God’s Presence.  We become part of it, a mirror for all to experience and encounter the living God. And so the disciples start down the mountain.  Jesus remains with them but they kept silent.  The truth was that Jesus knew that this account would only make sense in light of what was to come.  The disciples would know when to tell the story.  They saw more than Jesus on the mountain.  They also saw who and what he was.  And long after Jesus is gone from this earth, they will continue to tell this strange story of what they saw.  For now, he would just walk with them.  God’s presence remains. The Hebrews understood that no one could see God and live.  You know, I think they were right.  No one can see God and remain unchanged.  We die to ourselves and emerge in the cloud, unveiled before this God that so desires us to know the sacred and the holy that has always been before us.   The truth is, when we are really honest with ourselves, we probably are a little like the disciples.  We’d rather not really have “all” of God.  We’d rather control the way God enters and affects our lives.  We’d rather be a little more in control of any metamorphosis that happens in our lives.  We’d rather be able to pick and choose the way that our lives change.  We’d rather God’s Presence come blowing in at just the right moment as a cool, gentle, springtime breeze.  In fact, we’re downright uncomfortable with this devouring fire, bright lights, almost tornado-like God that really is God.

Here in the wilderness, with bright white lights and shrouds of wonder, we have seen God.  Here, in this place, where the wilderness has brought us.  We have arrived open-eyed and soul-ready for God’s Presence to be made known.  And this was nothing like anything that we would have imagined—Old Testament heroes re-appearing, God speaking from the cloud, and Jesus all lit up so brightly that it is hard for us to look at him.  And then the lights dim.  There are no chariots, Moses and Elijah are gone, and, if only for a little while, God stops talking.  And in the silence, Jesus starts walking down the mountain toward Jerusalem.  You know, on some level, for all the dramatic sequences of this story, I think the way down the mountain is the point of it all.  I mean, think about it, the disciples went up as students, as mentees, as admirers, and came down as followers.  The way down is where the transformation begins to be, when they know where they had to go.  Now I’m sure that Jesus knew that the ones who walked with him were not ready.  I’m sure he knew that they thought they had more time with him.  I’m sure he knew that they doubted themselves.  But it was time.  And Jesus knew that if they followed, they would know the way.  And in this moment, Jesus’ journey to the Cross begins and the disciples, for all the antics that they will pull over the next few days, begin the same journey.

And us?  I’m sure Jesus knows how difficult this has been for us.  I’m sure Jesus knows that there is a part of us that would’ve liked to have avoided the whole thing, to move from the Mardi Gras party right into the sanctuary when they are setting up the Easter lilies.  But then we would have missed the wilderness and we wouldn’t know where to go.  We know now what we must do, where we must go.  We know that we are called to follow Jesus.  The way down is hard.  Jerusalem is going to be even harder.  But the wilderness has taught us that it is where we must go.  You see, in this wilderness, we have changed.  We have learned to let go, to get out of ourselves, to see things differently.  We have learned to listen.  We have learned to follow.  And that is what we will do.  Jerusalem awaits.

 

When I first met him, I knew in a moment I would have to spend the next few days re-arranging my mind so there’d be room for him to stay. (Brian Andreas)

 

Jerusalem AwaitsFOR TODAY:  The gates of the city are just up ahead.  There is no other way around.  This is not an easy journey.  But it one that all of must walk.  As you enter this Holiest of Weeks, what do you need to leave behind?  And what do you need to carry into the city?

 

Grace and Peace,

Shelli